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Author Topic: The REAL daily joke thread:  (Read 2212 times)

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Offline BB_TTvanderNest

The REAL daily joke thread:
« Reply #135 on: Mar 05, 2017, 12:00 AM »
a Cammel can work a whole week without drinking
 
  a Grenader can drink a whole week without working

Offline rowman">BB_rowman

The REAL daily joke thread:
« Reply #136 on: Mar 07, 2017, 12:00 AM »
Why did psychic octopus ban Lloopy?
 
  Because it detected that she is an eX-Mod!

Offline LilMiss

The REAL daily joke thread:
« Reply #137 on: Mar 07, 2017, 12:00 AM »
    
       
          
                        
                Quote Originally Posted by rowman                 View Post              
             
Why did psychic octopus ban Lloopy?
 
  Because it detected that she is an eX-Mod!
                  
    
 

  Lol,
 
 
  when i left being a mod anoushka asked me what did I want as my forum title... only thing I could think of was ex-mod.... but opted to keep my mouth closed and stay with the forum titles, which was a safer option!
Phoenix Family

Offline rowman">BB_rowman

The REAL daily joke thread:
« Reply #138 on: Mar 07, 2017, 12:00 AM »
    
       
          
                        
                Quote Originally Posted by Lloopy14                 View Post              
             
....when i left being a mod anoushka asked me what did I want as my forum title... only thing I could think of was ex-mod.... but opted to keep my mouth closed and stay with the forum titles, which was a safer option!
                  
    
 
Agree that it was the safe decision, but that would have been so funny as it would have raised eyebrows!

Offline BB_B3astM0d3

The REAL daily joke thread:
« Reply #139 on: Mar 08, 2017, 12:00 AM »
There was once a man and his son. The man told his son that if he got straight A's in school, he would give him anything he wanted. So the son goes all throughout the school year and he does really well in school and get's straight A's. So the man goes up to his son and asks him what he wanted. The son said "I want a tennis ball". So the dad was confused about why he wanted a tennis ball but he went out a bought a tennis ball for his son and gave it to him. The next school year, the son was diagnosed with cancer and again the father said that if he got good grades in school he'd get him anything he wanted. So the school year passes and the son does really well. The father goes up to him and asks what do you want? The son then says "I want a crate of tennis balls". Now the father is super confused and and asks why do want tennis balls? And the son says I'll tell you later dad. So he gets the crate of tennis balls. So summer passes and the son health is a lot worse. Same thing happens and the dad tells him if he got good grades he would give him anything. The school year passes, he gets good grades and his father asks what do you want. The son then says "I want a truckload of tennis balls". The father is very confused now and he asks again "what is it that you need the tennis balls for son??" The son said I'll tell you soon dad. So the dad goes out and buys a whole truckload of tennis balls. The next year comes and the son is in the hospital, he is very sick. And the father sais son I'll get you anything you want now just let me know. The son replies that "I want 5 storage units worth of tennis balls dad". The father then asks "why son why??" The son said that he will tell him after he buys it. The father goes out and he buys 5 storage units of tennis balls and comes back to his son. Then he says "I've bought all these tennis balls for you son, why do you need so many?" The son then says "I wanted all these tennis balls because..." and then he dies. :P

Offline BB_vonline

The REAL daily joke thread:
« Reply #140 on: Mar 08, 2017, 12:00 AM »
How many [insert nationality you wish to make fun of here] does it take to shingle a roof?  
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
  3 if you slice them thin enough.

Offline Orrscores

The REAL daily joke thread:
« Reply #141 on: Mar 08, 2017, 12:00 AM »
    
       
          
                        
                Quote Originally Posted by vonline                 View Post              
             
How many [insert nationality you wish to make fun of here] does it take to shingle a roof?  
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
  3 if you slice them thin enough.
                  
    
 
I thought we couldn't joke about nationality. ...if we could I have some show stoppers but banned for sure.
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Offline Orrscores

The REAL daily joke thread:
« Reply #142 on: Mar 08, 2017, 12:00 AM »
The king knows he is dying and must come up with a way to choose which of his three sons will be next king.
  He calls a meeting with his 3 sons. "Sons.. the one of you that can collect for me the most amazing ping pong balls will be next king"
  The sons disperse.  Three days later the first son arrives with three solid gold ping pong balls..."very nice my son, lets see how your brothers do"
  Two days later the second son arrives with 4 diamond crusted gold ping pong balls."wow son,this may be tough to beat.
  A week goes by and finally the 3rd son arrives covered in blood and bruised badly holding two very large sacks. The king says" well son what type of ping pong balls did you bring you farther"
  The son replies"ping pong balls? I thought you said King Kongs balls"😁
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Offline BB_vonline

The REAL daily joke thread:
« Reply #143 on: Mar 08, 2017, 12:00 AM »
    
       
          
                        
                Quote Originally Posted by Orrscores                 View Post              
             
I thought we couldn't joke about nationality. ...if we could I have some show stoppers but banned for sure.
                  
    
 

  Fine then.  How many Bruins fans does it take to shingle a roof?

Offline Orrscores

The REAL daily joke thread:
« Reply #144 on: Mar 08, 2017, 12:00 AM »
    
       
          
                        
                Quote Originally Posted by vonline                 View Post              
             
Fine then.  How many Bruins fans does it take to shingle a roof?
                  
    
 
Lol. Should have known somthin like that was coming? Did you ever admit which team is your fav?
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Offline BB_Laisanity1221

The REAL daily joke thread:
« Reply #145 on: Mar 08, 2017, 12:00 AM »
    
       
          
                        
                Quote Originally Posted by Orrscores                 View Post              
             
The king knows he is dying and must come up with a way to choose which of his three sons will be next king.
  He calls a meeting with his 3 sons. "Sons.. the one of you that can collect for me the most amazing ping pong balls will be next king"
  The sons disperse.  Three days later the first son arrives with three solid gold ping pong balls..."very nice my son, lets see how your brothers do"
  Two days later the second son arrives with 4 diamond crusted gold ping pong balls."wow son,this may be tough to beat.
  A week goes by and finally the 3rd son arrives covered in blood and bruised badly holding two very large sacks. The king says" well son what type of ping pong balls did you bring you farther"
  The son replies"ping pong balls? I thought you said King Kongs balls"
                  
    
 
I'm dying from laughter lol.
  I tried to catch fog once. I mist.

Offline BB_Mul

The REAL daily joke thread:
« Reply #146 on: Mar 08, 2017, 12:00 AM »
    
       
          
                        
                Quote Originally Posted by Igotnuthin                 View Post              
             
Got some nerdy jokes.
 
  Q: Why do chemists have all the answers?
 
  A: because they have all the solutions.
 
  Q: a neutron walks into a bar and orders a drink. What does the bartender say?
 
  A: no charge for you!
                  
    
 

  Why is everyone telling bad chemistry jokes?
 
  Because all the good ones Argon

Offline BB_vonline

The REAL daily joke thread:
« Reply #147 on: Mar 08, 2017, 12:00 AM »
    
       
          
                        
                Quote Originally Posted by Mul                 View Post              
             
Why is everyone telling bad chemistry jokes?
 
  Because all the good ones Argon
                  
    
 
I'll give it to you, that one was a gas.

Offline BB_JohnCenaBB

The REAL daily joke thread:
« Reply #148 on: Oct 09, 2017, 01:00 AM »
Do you want to hear a joke?
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
  Brick's Cluster Grenade

Offline Orrscores

Re: The REAL daily joke thread:
« Reply #149 on: Oct 16, 2018, 04:39 AM »
Bump
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